This bird fools a lot of people, tourists thinks it's a Pelican but bird experts such as myself immediately recognize it as a Warm Water Gulf Coast Penguin. This species of Penguin hates cold water so using bits of seaweed and pieces of oyster shell it disguises itself to look like a Pelican so it can stay on the Gulf coast, but like any other Penguin this trickster can't fly. This Lesser Small Footed Beach Hopper is stuck in the sand as they usually are. Since they have tiny little feet they immediately sink into the sand, just like your car tires do, and in less a larger bird comes along and pulls them out they become the main food source for the Warm Water Gulf Coast Penguin which can't fly or run very fast and depends on its food to be stuck in the sand. Being a renowned expert in bird behavior I instantly recognized this all-too-familiar situation. The large bird, which is a duck or a chicken or something, is being surrounded by a gang of small birds known as Robins. And there called Robins because they wear black masks and rob other birds. These situations can get fairly ugly, so I left the area before the feathers flew. The extremely rare, endangered, and stupid, Feather Headed Tide Croaker, lays its eggs on the outgoing tide where they float out to sea and are immediately eaten by the Giant Kraken, apparently there very nutritious. Since a Feather Headed Tide Croaker's eggs have never been known to last long enough to hatch, in order to save the species, efforts are being made to breed this bird with anything smarter than dirt.
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